When you look with your eyes, everything seems nice
Posted on 7th November 2007 by Gloria
I love news. I just went onto the BBC website and the banner at the top of the page announced;
“It is illegal to die in the Houses of Parliament”.
Well, I had to look into that further and found out that UKTV Gold have recently done a poll on what the most ridiculous laws are. The one about dying in parliament came top, followed by using a postage stamp up-side-down being classed as treason (whoops…!). In third place (my personal favourite, actually) is the law that states that only a clerk in a tropical fish store has permission to be topless in public in Liverpool.
Another goodie is an Ohio law which states that it is illegal to get fish drunk.
Kill-joys.
Susie
November 7th, 2007
3:36 pm
Let’s get some fish drunk!! We don’t live in Ohio.
Jonny Evans
November 7th, 2007
3:39 pm
Good thinking! I’m with you Susie!
Ros
November 7th, 2007
8:05 pm
Definately sounds like a good plan. Also, if you die in the Houses of Parliament, what are they actually gonna do about it?
Susie
November 7th, 2007
10:04 pm
Ros raises a good point. So, how are we gonna do this fish thing? I guess putting them in pure alcohol would kill them before we saw the hilarious affects? But I’m not sure. Maybe it should be diluted. Do you think its better to put them into the tank or to slowly pour alcohol into the tank they are already in? Also, wine or spirits. This may take some planning. And a fish. Anyone got one they’re not bothered about?
Gloria
November 8th, 2007
7:58 am
Apparently the reason you’re not allowed to die in Parliament is because if you do, you’re entitled to a state funeral. So maybe they give you a state funeral then leave your body to rot in prison?
I reckon slowly adding alcohol to the tank the fish are already in would be best, otherwise they might just die of binge drinking.
Mat
November 8th, 2007
9:35 am
Can a fish hiccup?
There’s a by-law in Chester that states you’re allowed to kill a Welshman with a crossbow within the City walls after midnight. I don’t think they specified the Welshman, just if you see one roaming about.
Susie
November 8th, 2007
11:00 am
This is why we need to do it, to see things like if they hiccup.
There’s a law like that in York. I think its a Scotsman in York though.
Jonny Evans
November 8th, 2007
12:22 pm
That’s great. Technically, any time in the day is after midnight. It should really specify a start time and an end time.
[Jonny says whilst brandishing his bow and arrow]
Mat
November 8th, 2007
1:33 pm
Jonny, if you use a regular bow and arrow you’ll be put in the stocks, it has to be a crossbow! I wouldn’t want you getting into trouble, when you just wanted to partake in some sport hunting of Welsh people!
Susie, have you made provisions for stomach pumping if they get ill? Or are you happy to sacrifice the lives of some goldfish in the name of ’scientific’ research?
Andy
November 8th, 2007
5:28 pm
The rule in York is ‘during curfew’ rather than after midnight. It’s probably the same in Chester as they are pretty much the same place just in a different location and one of them doesn’t have Hollyoaks.
But it does have Acomb. I’ve always thought of the two as similar.
Jonny Evans
November 9th, 2007
10:12 am
Ok,
So we’ve settled on it then… we’re all gonna head to Chester and
1) get some fish drunk. We have various methods so we can decide the best approach
2) after midnight (but before sunrise) we are gonna go medieval on some Welshmen
Well… that’s my weekend all planning out.
Also, can we be guaranteed that there will be Welshmen out and about in Chester after dark, or shall we kidnap some of our own and then release them into the city. It’ll be a bit like the classic film “The Running Man”.
Mat
November 9th, 2007
11:41 am
I spend a bit of time in Chester, and I know of some Welshmen who live there, so I could lure them out and then you could ambush them? Or, there are plenty of Roman walls, so we could set ourselves up like snipers, and pick them off from a distance?
Am I thinking about this too much?
Let’s just get a rainbow fish absolutely off his crutches!
Jonny Evans
November 9th, 2007
12:39 pm
Then we could blame the rainbow fish for the Welshmen Massacre. Granted, we don’t really need a patsy because it will be a legal massacre - but it can’t hurt to have a back up.
Mat
November 9th, 2007
1:30 pm
The fish is called Patsy? You do know that if you name it, it’ll be harder to cope with when it dies from alcohol poisoning?!
Also, can we get some consensus on what type of alcohol we’re going to give it? Vodka or whiskey might be too strong, but Patsy might not be able to handle the bubbles in a lager. Maybe Guinness?
Jonny Evans
November 9th, 2007
3:55 pm
Yeah, but they like salt water… so maybe a bitter or something similar. Boddingtons?
Jonny Evans
November 9th, 2007
3:56 pm
Or rum.
Pirates (on the sea - tenuous link to fish) were pretty big on it - so that may work
Gloria
November 9th, 2007
4:20 pm
Depends what sort of fish it is. If it’s a fresh-water fish it won’t like salt water. I’d kind of imagined it’d be a goldfish.
Should I be saying ’she’ rather than it, seeing as we’ve now named it Patsy?
Maybe wine would work best, not to strong, like a spirit, but not too bubbly either…?
Kate
November 9th, 2007
4:36 pm
Sorry to interrupt the intellectual debate but I’m moving house tomorrow - I was just wondering if anyone was free to give me a hand?
Meet me at mine at 10.30 - I’ll buy doughnuts.
Jonny Evans
November 9th, 2007
4:45 pm
You see Kate - you’re request is flawed.
If you’d said:
“Sorry to interrupt the intellectual debate but I’m moving house tomorrow - I was just wondering if anyone was free to give me a hand?
Meet me at mine at 10.30 - I’ll buy Patsy and a nice bottle of red”
then I think you’d have more luck!
Kate
November 9th, 2007
6:11 pm
OK, it’s a deal!
Call me when you get near Plymouth and I’ll give you directions…
Pete
November 11th, 2007
9:16 pm
Having just read the last 2 comments and not many more I thought that Jony was planning to buy Craigs mum a bottle of red.
Its ages since I have been here! I am still computerless.
mine was supposed to be delivered yesterday, but didnt come.
Andy
November 11th, 2007
9:25 pm
Did you get a mac?
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