18
War, never been so much fun.
We bought a new computer today. As I type this message I am reading it aloud. There is no real reason for this. But sometimes I like to feel like an author in a film…
I imagine the music playing softly as the camera scans across the keyboard and my smooth, calm voice delights the viewer. It’s a great opening to a film. Honestly. Also (I’ve stopped reading out loud now) I had a dream last night. It was about us. Everyone on the blog. We were all at a Counting Crows gig. Susie sang a song with Adam, Katie married a hamburger and we all ended up on the tour bus.
And now - back to the actual point of this post. We bought a new computer via the Dell website. It’s not a mac. But it’s very good. It has 7500gb RAM. When we were filling in the delivery details the following questions were asked:
Very thorough security checking I feel.
Are you having fun playing with the new pc?
There is something very exciting about a brand new pc, or maybe thats just me!
and what is with the Jelly text?
We don’t have the computer yet… we only ordered it today. Hey - there’s a thing - if Dell offered same day delivery then I’d be happy to pay the £60 delivery charge that the discounted.
The jelly text was a case of mistaken identity. Please ignore!
Ooooh… a new shiny pc.
I hope you post a picture of the new addition to the family (no - not you amazon.. it isn’t all about you!)
Ohh…very nice…I hope you enjoy it. I am now living in Grimsby (just south of the humber estary) now. Its all really good-Got a nice flat on hospital grounds, litrually 1min and 33 seconds walk away from the ward I am based on. The flat mates are my housemates from Hull. And I will have my first driving lesson tonight! I can’t wait. The only down side is that I do not have t’internet in my flat, so I have to come into the med school building to use it. So I might not be on the blog as much as I would like.
Bro, that made me laugh a lot! (Wow, ‘Bro!’ Now I feel all grown up - remember when we used to grin at dad and Neil and Andy for call each other ‘bro’?
Incidentally, if you did actually fill that in, you’re probably on a list somewhere now. I would recommend never using the word Jihad over the phone. Or in an email. Or on a blog.
Oh.
Also incidentally, Kathye, hello. Email me again and I promise I’ll reply this time.
Also also incidentally, Andy, did you say Dell do cheap year-old laptops? I want a new one.
Incidentally, your cheque still hasn’t arrived Jack.
Not that I’m complaining, I just wanted you to know.
Ahh I did wonder if it was to me by mistake, I ran over my phone today and its now in about 20+ peices and I think can officially be declared dead, and I have no money to replace it at present, I am a fool!
Jack - Will do!
Don’t worry Jack - I put my name down as Mr O Bin Laden. They’ll never find me.
I’ve emailed you about the laptops etc. And - to repeat a gag used on an earlier thread - my cheque hasn’t arrived either.
Kathye - were you just using that as an excuse to get a new phone? I think you were… although that was a new phone wasn’t it?!
jihadterrorismnuclearreactorplutoniumkaboomgdetonateassasinatekillwarexplode
You forgot ‘death to Bush!’
And shrub.
And tree.
And grass.
And Sushi, I’ve deleted your address, that’s why no cheque. I wasn’t sure ‘Sushi, Brighton’ would reach you.
Also I’m having a week off (not a wee cough) so haven’t really done much.
Sorry.
Although I think you’ll appreciate the card.
Yes it was a brand new phone, well for me, its about 6months old and so yes, no new phone for me, when my replacement sim arrives it will be a Very old phone till my contract runs out, cause Hannah found my more recent old one and slobbered on it and it will no longer switch on.
I am still berating myself for managing to do something quite so stupid
Andy, can you email me about the cheap laptops? Or just tell me on the blog? Is it a secret website you get them from jihad?
Yeah - we’re only allowed to purchase them from the website if we have passed through Jihad training school…
I am almost becoming concerned about the real possibility that this blog may get watched by some government somewhere soon.
My email response to Jack was basically a very long winded version of “How much do you consider cheap?” and that then led to me suggesting EITHER going through Dell Outlet for one off chances to buy laptops around the £250 mark - usually XP, 1gb / 2gb not GREAT but certainly do a job… or going to wizmarkcomputers and finding a Dell deal that you like before customising it a bit.
My advice, as you may be able to tell, centered mainly around Dell - but this is only because it’s what I know - we buy Dell at school and they are good. I bought a Dell Desktop and got a great deal on it through these sites. Have a look.
Hope that helps.
Now you have to jihad someone.
I’ve jihadded the buddha. He seems like a peaceful kind of guy so probably won’t mind that much. Plus, he’s really fat so I can run away from him.
Now to dell outlet to pine over computers on which to mastermind my terrorism plot to blow up the world using only jelly and sticky back plastic.
And a computer surely? Otherwise what’s the point?
Is it wrong that the phrase jihadded makes me laugh? Has there been a movie with the line “I’m gonna jihad your ass”? If not - someone should use it.
Speaking of things that make me laugh… did anyone see That Mitchell And Webb Look last night? There was a genius sketch… and it’s on Youtube already.
Genius.
For anyone who knows him I am pretty sure that this is what Dave Moore would produce if asked to make an advert for Sky Sports Football…